Motivation, Negative and Positive Meaning

I think as an uxorious man I like to connect the meaningful numinous relationship experience to my motivation for everything, but I also think this motivation rarely works very far from the engendering numinous experience. Thus if my wife is not immediately and actively involved in my getting the task at hand done, then I do not feel meaningfully motivated by the numinous relationships experience - I have to find some other meaningful motivation. I don't think this is entirely a bad thing, that the power of meaningful experiences only radiate so far, because it occurs to me there is such a thing as negative meaning.

Positive meaning would be occasioned by the usual joy happiness and contentment, while negative meaning by horror, dismay and dread. I thought of this because negative things can be numinous too; for proof all one need do is have a near death experience or even simply contemplate one's death long enough. I think we often think of these negative meanings as 'evil', but perhaps good and evil are a scale of meaning as much as a scale of morality.

And then there are the 'positive negative things' such as 'at least this bad thing didn’t happen', which are good but only negatively so, because they are not positively good; yet they may be equally occasioned by joy, happiness and contentment. And this reminds me of hope again, and of the power of belief: "well this bad thing hasn't happened (yet), so I am happy (or hopeful) (for the future)."

This still leaves me wondering about where the numinous relationship experience comes from, how to maintain it and maintain other meaningful motivations at the same - all in one mental framework.

How many different numinous nodes of human experience can there be?