Often my wife discerns my present devotion to her by not telling me exactly what to do, because despite the fact it's easier for me to know and do what makes her happy if she simply tells me, such faithful following orders doesn't demonstrate careful observation and loving attention to her person and character. She feels my interior space dedication level is proportionate to the level of consideration and planning my choices display, so by not telling me precisely what to do she allows me the freedom to demonstrate the level of my devotion in a method and manner, in a love symbol, she understands.
Since I prefer her telling me what to do for her happiness and showing my interior space dedication and devotion by my willingness and continuing commitment to doing those things, obviously some love symbol negotiation is necessary. Unsurprisingly, much of our compromise consists of my learning to effectively deliver in love symbols she understands because by doing so I often manage my love symbol of participating in her pleasure, yet she does her fair share for me as well. I have found making these adjustments often affords us more opportunities for greater intimacy but also improves the accuracy of our already functioning love symbols.
Perhaps the point is more about the compatibility of love symbols, for where relationship love symbols are not already adequately compatible, communication and negotiation, whether verbal or not, tacit or not, recognized or not, is eventually going to be necessary. This often means we do not always get enough of the love symbol we want exactly the way we want it all the time. Rather than simply allow our heart's reception atrophy upon what has always worked for us, we must adjust our interiors, expand our love horizons, act with a will towards the dynamic maintenance of loyalty with our partner rather than rest in an atrophy of love symbols and remain unfulfilled.
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[...] time I don’t feel tempted by them. Already in the maintenance of loyalty I have learned to focus on love rather than the love symbols, to preserve the soul of our relationship without distractions like porn, and to see the worth of [...]
ReplyDelete[...] piece on the interior may be love and affection but we may think what we need is sex and sexuality; perhaps we have specific love symbols that work for us and unintentionally focus on the symbol more .... Or perhaps we intentionally try to use something like sex as a substitute symbol, even though we [...]
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